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Sivs Journey

Page history last edited by Amy 15 years, 5 months ago

 

 

 

As the sun sets over the land, shadows envelope the valley. Siv walks down the path and shivers in the cool evening air. He wonders where this path is going to take him. Will he ever be able to find his way back? He brushes off the fear that is creeping up his spine and treads on along the dark and shadowy path. This is the spot, he tells himself, they said to come here. After a few minutes, he has almost forgotten what he was so afraid of. Then he sees that the path is leading to a large cave entrance in the side of the valley. He continues up the path, but hesitates at the mouth of the cave. He can feel the cool draft flowing from the cave. He shakes his fear and slowly enters the cave. He takes out a small flashlight out of his pocket and shines it in front of him. The dim light barely illuminates his way, but he knows he must continue to find what he is seeking. Suddenly, he slips on a rock and drops his flashlight. The light rolls away down a hole in the cave. He sees the light as it slips down the hole. He inches carefully toward the opening and peers down inside. He suddenly feels a warm surrounding him and begins to lose consciousness. He struggles to stay awake, but he can’t. He can’t. He collapses to the cave floor starts rolling towards the hole. As the world around him fades, he hears one word reverberate through the entire cave and makes his hair stand on end. Randomness.

 

Siv awakens to a large, bright room in the cave. He foggily wonders how his dim flashlight is illuminating the entire room, when he sees his flashlight. As he picks it up, he sees that it had landed on a switch labelled "Light". He wonders what the switch might be for. Shrugging, he stands to his feet to inspect this room more closely. The room is about the size of a football field. Most of the room is actually a deep hole, with two small ledges opposite each other, on one of which Siv is standing. He looks above him and wonders how he is supposed to get out of here. He decides to inch closer to the edge and peer over the edge of this hole. He is walking very slowly when he notices a smooth, polished metal plate attached to the very edge of the ledge. As he approaches it, he sees that it is somehow flashing the message, "Step Here". He hesitates, and then steps out onto the thin metal plate separating him from the bottomless pit.

The metal plate quivers slightly, and Siv is just about to jump back onto the ledge when another similar square plate suddenly appears in front of him with a whoosh. He sees that it is flashing the same message as the other plate, so he steps onto it and another appears in front of him. He steps on that plate. He is about to step forward when he realizes that there is no plate there. One has appeared on his left side. He steps to the left and one appears to his right. As he steps from plate to plate, he finds himself walking in a random zigzag pattern, and wonders if this is a trap. After what seems like hours, he reaches the other ledge, with the entrance to a long, dark tunnel before him. He walks down the tunnel and soon comes to what seems to be a reception room with a perky young woman sitting at the receptionist's desk.

 

"Hi, I'm Charlotte. Welcome to the headquarters of the Peanut Butter Randoms! What is your name? Oh, never mind, we don't have any name tags left. Oh, well! We can start the tour now." Charlotte shows Siv all the bizarre places in the headquarters of the Peanut Butter Randoms. "This is a cheese whiz fountain. And see the walls? The bricks are really dollar store calculators, and the mortar is peanut butter!" Siv nods and tries to act like he was interested in what his tour guide is saying.

 

Charlotte leads Siv to a large throne room. In the center of the back wall there are three thrones. In the center throne, which is pink and purple, is sitting a young woman with dark hair. She is wearing a crown which says ‘Superpower’. To her right is another throne that is blue and pink. On it sits another young woman, also with dark hair. She is wearing a crown which says ‘Purple’. The blue-green throne on the left is empty. "We can't go in there, sorry. The Randoms don't want tours going through right now because they're waiting for their third member, named Siv." Siv is about to say something when Charlotte leads him away and finishes the tour.

 

Siv thanks the kind receptionist/tour guide and then gets in the elevator. The song "Tonight" by FM Static is playing. He feels as if he’s about to cry when he reaches the third floor. he makes his way back to the throne room.

 

"Oh, hi, Siv!" says Amy, Queen of Randomness.

 

"Hey!" says BBB, Empress of Words.

 

"Hi, guys!" says Siv, Overlord of all that is Good and Mutated. "Did you guys hire a new receptionist while I was out getting peanut butter?"

 

BBB gives a laugh. "Yeah, sorry about that. The old one started throwing our jelly everywhere. What a mess!"

 

"That's fine. You should have showed her my picture, though. She just gave the whole three-hour tour."

Siv takes his place on his throne and puts on his crown, labelled ‘Hamster’. “I loved our new entrance by the way.” The three Randoms begin to discuss urgent international affairs.

 

BBB looks over the ‘to do’ list. "The Mongolian Camels are rebelling again. Shall we make them listen to "Tonight" a hundred times?"

 

"Sounds good to me," Amy says as she smiles, her eyes lighting with excitement. "We`ve been waiting for you to get back before we had any fun. I need some excitement!”

And so begins another day of world domination for the Peanut Butter Randoms Supporting Purplicious World Domination and Battling Meatless Chicken Burgers with Copyrights. All goes well until...

 

"Hey! This isn't a peanut butter sandwich! It's a- a meatless chicken burger!" BBB throws down the simulated meat and presses the Emergency button. The alarms sound off and the lights begin to flash.

Immediately, a group of penguins wearing biohazard suits and gas masks runs into the throne room. One of them covers the simulated meat with a titanium bowl and detonates explosives inside, destroying the evilness."Thanks, guys! Now, let's get back to spamming people!"

 

Like, The End. Totally.

 

This story is property of the Peanut Butter Randoms Supporting World Domination and Battling Meatless Chicken Burgers with Copyrights. If any of you people out there try to steal it and use it for something else, we shall write down the numbers 1,2,3,4, and 5 on pieces of paper and put them in a hat. If we draw #1: You shall spend the rest of your days in a small closet eating canned lima beans and frog legs. If we draw #2: You shall be forced to pay off a $50000000000000000 fine by painting white walls in bright sunlight at a rate of $0.001/hour, in which case the sun will reflect off of the white paint and fry your eyeballs (trust us, we know what it's like). If we draw #3: You shall be forced to work as a slave at Bubba's Heavenly Hula Shack located on Old Gate Road in Odyssey, where you will spend the rest of your mortal life, and part of your immortal one, modeling hula outfits made from all natural materials for both genders. Hope you like wearing palm fronds and coconuts. If we pick #4: We shall strap several packages' worth of batteries to you, douse you in water, stick a light bulb in your mouth, give you a couple of electric fly swatters to hold, hoist you up on the top of a metal pole on top of a big hill during an electrical storm, and wait to see if you glow when you get hit by lightning. If we draw #5: We shall throw you into the Oracle of the Order of the Meatless Meat! (We know it's not original anymore, but we just had to include it!) And if we're too lazy to pick a number out of the hat, um... we'll poke you really hard in the arm! Beware!

Comments (1)

Amy said

at 12:56 am on Jun 26, 2008

Yay Sivvy!!! :D

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